Rules of Myspace
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- obiwankobe
- Posts: 2828
- Joined: Mon Mar 14, 2005 11:56 am
- Location: Newbury Park
- Contact:
Rules of Myspace
rules of myspace
1. "NEW PICS" bulletins are fucking desperate and sad.
2. Don't throw up gang signs in your user pictures.
(f.y.i. actual gangsters don't have myspaces, sorry)
3. Don't flash gang signs anywhere, at all, end of story.
4. List bands that don't really exist in your profile, it's cool.
5. myspace is not real life.
6. If you've ever posted a "myspace is shutting down" bulletin, i fucking hate you, and your entire family. If you honestly took your time to re-post something for fear of having your precious myspace deleted, then i've probably lost all respect for you, and you should look into getting a life...
7. Slideshow's, 2+ video's on a page, and "insane graphics", do not make you look cool. They make you annoying. And yes, i hate you.
8. If you highly exploit the idea that you've ever smoked marijuana before, with every other word on your page, and "sick pics of ur BONG" then check yourself. Realize that you've based your entire image around being less intelligent than most.
9. School pictures, sports team pictures, and pictures of your friends, without you in them, are all things that nobody gives a fuck about. And deep down inside, you've known that all along.
10. You should probably question your sexuality if you take more pictures of yourself, than anything else in your camera...
11. "i don't really watch tv" = LIAR
12. FORBIDDEN is hot.
13. If you list anyone who's ever appeared on MTV's Trl, in your heroes section, then you need to drive your goddamn jetta away from the mall, and go to a fucking library. Now.
14. myspace is not real life.
15. If you die, before deleting your myspace, it will be up as long as anyone else's is.
16. If you die, because of your myspace being deleted, i lack sympathy for you. This is not the stock market. If Tom dies, and you label the upcoming drama "the great depression", i will strongly consider hunting your family pet..
17. Myspace has made Tila Tequila a genuine low-level celebrity... honestly, think about that...
18. Posting the same bulletin 3 times in a row is never an accident, and is only idiotic. It should grant you a free punch in the throat.
19. myspace is not real life
20. comments;
a. "thnx 4 the add" is not a comment... it's a message
b."just showin' sum luv" is not a comment...it's a stupid message
c."oh my god, u were sooooo wasted last night at the show, i can't
believe u gave that creepy guy your number!!!!" is not a comment, it's a sad attempt to exploit the lesser known fact that you might possibly have a non-internet social life.
d. promoting your band or website, is not a comment, it's lame...
21. straight guys flexing with their shirts off are not straight
22. friendster was not "back in the day"
23. Nobody wants to watch the "So Crazy In Love" video everytime they look at your page.
24. No one wants to watch the "So Crazy In Love" video, period.
25. Posting a comment such as "yum, ur fucken hawtt," or "damn, ur hella fine" underneath a decent-looking girl's picture is not going to get you laid... ever.
26. Myspace is not real life.
27. You're never going get to a free I-Pod, with no strings attached ever... sorry.
28. "Cool New People"...according to fucking who?
29. You never actually "only made one to look at other peoples". It's a lie, and a shitty one at that.
30. Listing your city/location with the word "baby!!" after it, is not appealing...
31. NeIthEr iZ WrItInG LyKe ThIs 0r +h!$. (if you've ever done that, ever, even "in like 7th grade", i will never have sex with you.)
32. If you use the terms: "scenesters, hardcore kids, electro-clashers, or punx, or write the abbreviation HxC, sXe, even in the sense that your making fun of the above listed, i hate you. i don't think you're cool, and i'd most likely like to pour Morton Salt in your eyelids..
1. "NEW PICS" bulletins are fucking desperate and sad.
2. Don't throw up gang signs in your user pictures.
(f.y.i. actual gangsters don't have myspaces, sorry)
3. Don't flash gang signs anywhere, at all, end of story.
4. List bands that don't really exist in your profile, it's cool.
5. myspace is not real life.
6. If you've ever posted a "myspace is shutting down" bulletin, i fucking hate you, and your entire family. If you honestly took your time to re-post something for fear of having your precious myspace deleted, then i've probably lost all respect for you, and you should look into getting a life...
7. Slideshow's, 2+ video's on a page, and "insane graphics", do not make you look cool. They make you annoying. And yes, i hate you.
8. If you highly exploit the idea that you've ever smoked marijuana before, with every other word on your page, and "sick pics of ur BONG" then check yourself. Realize that you've based your entire image around being less intelligent than most.
9. School pictures, sports team pictures, and pictures of your friends, without you in them, are all things that nobody gives a fuck about. And deep down inside, you've known that all along.
10. You should probably question your sexuality if you take more pictures of yourself, than anything else in your camera...
11. "i don't really watch tv" = LIAR
12. FORBIDDEN is hot.
13. If you list anyone who's ever appeared on MTV's Trl, in your heroes section, then you need to drive your goddamn jetta away from the mall, and go to a fucking library. Now.
14. myspace is not real life.
15. If you die, before deleting your myspace, it will be up as long as anyone else's is.
16. If you die, because of your myspace being deleted, i lack sympathy for you. This is not the stock market. If Tom dies, and you label the upcoming drama "the great depression", i will strongly consider hunting your family pet..
17. Myspace has made Tila Tequila a genuine low-level celebrity... honestly, think about that...
18. Posting the same bulletin 3 times in a row is never an accident, and is only idiotic. It should grant you a free punch in the throat.
19. myspace is not real life
20. comments;
a. "thnx 4 the add" is not a comment... it's a message
b."just showin' sum luv" is not a comment...it's a stupid message
c."oh my god, u were sooooo wasted last night at the show, i can't
believe u gave that creepy guy your number!!!!" is not a comment, it's a sad attempt to exploit the lesser known fact that you might possibly have a non-internet social life.
d. promoting your band or website, is not a comment, it's lame...
21. straight guys flexing with their shirts off are not straight
22. friendster was not "back in the day"
23. Nobody wants to watch the "So Crazy In Love" video everytime they look at your page.
24. No one wants to watch the "So Crazy In Love" video, period.
25. Posting a comment such as "yum, ur fucken hawtt," or "damn, ur hella fine" underneath a decent-looking girl's picture is not going to get you laid... ever.
26. Myspace is not real life.
27. You're never going get to a free I-Pod, with no strings attached ever... sorry.
28. "Cool New People"...according to fucking who?
29. You never actually "only made one to look at other peoples". It's a lie, and a shitty one at that.
30. Listing your city/location with the word "baby!!" after it, is not appealing...
31. NeIthEr iZ WrItInG LyKe ThIs 0r +h!$. (if you've ever done that, ever, even "in like 7th grade", i will never have sex with you.)
32. If you use the terms: "scenesters, hardcore kids, electro-clashers, or punx, or write the abbreviation HxC, sXe, even in the sense that your making fun of the above listed, i hate you. i don't think you're cool, and i'd most likely like to pour Morton Salt in your eyelids..
-tom
~"Let there be no conflict in America, if you bother me, I whup yo' ass."~Charles Barkley
~"Let there be no conflict in America, if you bother me, I whup yo' ass."~Charles Barkley
Re: Rules of Myspace
Send them to a public library!!! I don't want them here!!!obiwankobe wrote: 13. If you list anyone who's ever appeared on MTV's Trl, in your heroes section, then you need to drive your goddamn jetta away from the mall, and go to a fucking library. Now.
~Gooch
"Librarians are the secret masters of the world. They control information. Don't ever piss one off..."
"Librarians are the secret masters of the world. They control information. Don't ever piss one off..."
MySpace rules
I actually made it through that entire list of Tom's without actually doing ONE THING on his list! YAY!
Can we have sex now, Tom?
(Hoping he doesn't notice that I actually do have Mr. Shovel on my Heroes list.) Shhhhh.
--Miche
Can we have sex now, Tom?
(Hoping he doesn't notice that I actually do have Mr. Shovel on my Heroes list.) Shhhhh.
--Miche
Loving ALL of Indie's shows, especially the guys they've been having in the morning!
- obiwankobe
- Posts: 2828
- Joined: Mon Mar 14, 2005 11:56 am
- Location: Newbury Park
- Contact:
This is why you like it*Annie* wrote:Ugh, MySpace is not ALL that bad.... so there's a few idiots there (a lot)... but they're everywhere else too...
If you "properly" use MySpace, it's pretty cool.
INTERPOL LYRICS
"Narc"
Touch your thighs, I'm the lonely one
Remember that lass, because that was the right one
Oh, all your mysteries are moving in the sun
And show some love and respect
Wanna get some love and respect
Baby you can see that the gazing eye won't lie
Don't give up your lover tonight
Cause it's just you, me and this fire, alright
Let's tend to the engine tonight
Oh
She found a lonely sound
She keeps on waiting for time out there
Oh love, can you love me babe
Love, is this loving babe
Is time turning around
Feast your eyes, I'm the only one
Control me, console me
Cause that's just how it should be done
Oh, all your history's like fire from a busted gun
Now show some love and respect
Don't wanna get a life of regret
But baby you can see that the gazing eye won't lie
Don't give up your lover tonight
She found a lonely sound
She keeps on waiting for time out there
Oh love, can you love me babe
Love, is this loving babe
Is time turning around
He slips into the bedroom
And you know he misses alright
Old names, we'll make sweet
Will sustain us through the night
Inside my bedroom baby
Touch me, oh tonight
Promises, we'll make some
Will reveal our sense of right
You should be in myspace
You should be in my life
You should be in myspace
You should be in my life
You could be in myspace
dork
-tom
~"Let there be no conflict in America, if you bother me, I whup yo' ass."~Charles Barkley
~"Let there be no conflict in America, if you bother me, I whup yo' ass."~Charles Barkley